Just let it go

(this is a post I saved as a draft a few days ago but didn't publish)

It's sort of an after-debate-tournament tradition, bringing your debate ballots home and reading them the next day, late at night, when you know you really should be doing all that homework you always bring to debate tournaments, but never do. But the lure of that thick packet of heavily written upon sheets (best case scenario: white, worst case: yellow) is irresistible, especially when given the choice between that or another hour of math homework.

While reading them through again, I can feel myself starting to get worked up about the ignorant offhand comments of some of the judges. But I have to remember the words of our coach: "Just let it go." I have to start at the beginning of this story in order to explain this while making sense. You see, the best parts of debate are the moments after you come back from an especially fierce round, and you bash the other teams (figuratively, not literally) with other members of your own team. Call it team bonding. It's a small window of time which takes place early enough so that you're still pumped with the adrenaline from you round, but not late enough so that the energy has started to wear off, and you begin to feel depressed about obnoxious teams and clueless judges. But those moments are priceless: when looking back at debate tournaments (which really do comprise a large portion of my high school years), I'll remember that feeling of being part of a team: talking over each other in our rush to get our our stories, complaining about your opponents, having others relate to how frustrating it is to debate a certain team, congratulating people as they come off a high from a particularly easy round, supporting everyone and telling them that of course they beat that annoying team from our rival school. Debate may be either a solo or partner activity, but it's really those times when you remember, and actually feel like you are part of a team.

Going back to the point of this blog, even though it's fun and all to bash the other teams and judges to encourage this whole team bonding experience, there is a certain point where you just have to say to yourself, "I'm going to let it go." There are always going to be nasty opponents and harsh judges, but the reality is, you have to accept the good, take the useful criticism, and just let the rest go. You can't let a comment like, "If you don't know how to give a handshake, don't do one at all" keep you from ever shaking the hand of a judge. (And yes, this was an actual comment I got from a judge...ironic, coming from a 60 year old woman with the grip of a sleeping baby...I'm just a little bitter, can you tell?). So as not to give you the wrong idea, I'm not saying all judges give critical remarks like such, there are actually some quite amusing quotes from judges, which we put on the back of our Speech & Debate shirt last year:

"You know you have to speak, right?"
"Calm down, I thought you were going to strangle your opponent in the middle of cross ex."
"You sound like an LD debater - it's kind of cute."
"This is the final round. How did you ever get this far?"
"1/7th is not 35%. Your math teacher should fail you."
"In your CX: He's not going to agree with you. AND IT'S OK."

Anyway, I guess the point of this post was to relate my coach's words to life. It's a pretty good attitude to have: accept the good that comes to you in life, take meaningful criticism and use it to your advantage, and just let all of the negative energy go.